I don't know if I've mentioned it here before or not.. but the area we live in is still pretty new, and they are building new homes around us all the time, and they are always trying to catch up on the things around us to support all these new people. This means that the ward of our church we go to has been HUMONGOUS. For those of you aware of the normal size and scope of an LDS ward, let me just say that it looked like Stake conference every week. It's been nuts. We knew they'd eventually be splitting our ward, and it finally happened a couple weeks ago.
We were very excited about the split because 1. we'd finally have a normal sized ward and wouldn't be stuck sitting in the very back of the gym on the hard metal chairs. 2. the new ward met at 11am, my favorite meeting time :). and 3. we could finally get to know people, and not feel lost in a sea of crazy mormons, lol. Sadly however, our two good friends, the Nelson's and the Kitterman's ended up on the other side of the dividing line. Only in Utah would people who live one block away from you will end up in a different ward. In Texas I drove an hour to get to my tiny branch!
It was kind of depressing when we found out they wouldn't be in our ward anymore. When we first moved into our house we met a nice couple in our ward and made friends.. and then the ward split, and they ended up in the other ward.. now it splits again and my friends end up in the other ward. Makes ya feel like somebody out there doesn't want you to have friends in your ward.
Due to various travels, baby blessings and sickness Sunday a week and a couple days ago was the first time we'd been able to make it to the whole block of meetings since we split. I was very tempted to use the prego card and go home after sacrament. I was tired, achey, hungry, uncomfortable.. I just didn't want to be there. However now we have a little girl who adores going to her nursery class... and so I stuck it out. Tho I definitely did not have a good attitude. I sat with Tom in Sunday school looking around at all these strangers, feeling like I didn't fit it, I didn't have any friends here, and chances are I wouldn't make any. I was having a complete pity party in my head. After this I DEFINITELY wanted to go home.. but that would've meant pulling the previously mentioned little girl out of her nursery class to slink home... so I stuck it out again.
In relief society I was asked to give the opening prayer. I hate giving the prayer.. I never know what to say.. I feel like there's all this pressure.. and you have to make sure it's not too short or you sound like you dont care.. and not too long, cuz then people start rolling their eyes under their closed eyelids.. anyway.. I just don't like doing it. But I did. I stood and I thanked Heavenly Father for 'the wonderful sisters in our ward' (even tho I in no way knew or believed them to be wonderful) and asked for us to 'appreciate each other'.
I don't think I have had a prayer answered so quickly in all my life.
The lesson was on a conference talk about loving each other.. and it ended up being one of those great lessons where everyone talks and gets personal and real... and not about how we could all learn to love another better, lol. A couple minutes into the lesson somebody commented something along the lines of 'I'm sorry.. but some people are just toxic and too hard to love and you have to walk away'.. and the lesson took on a life of it's own. And I saw these women as people.. not as these perfect little LDS stereotypes sitting there judging little imperfect me, but as real people with real problems and insane relatives and crazy friends, just like me. :)
And some of them were SO funny! We were all laughing and crying.. and I thought for the first time, you know what.. I could belong here. These ARE great women.. I could find a place here, I could find people who like me for me, and who I can appreciate too.
I think, as LDS women it can be so easy to try and make yourself into what you think you are supposed to be. It was so freeing and wonderful for me to see these women just being themselves. I've probably said this before.. but there are few things I believe as passionately as I believe that women need other women. I hope I can learn from these women.. and be brave enough to be myself. (is there anything scarier than being yourself and putting it out there on the line?? or is that just me?)
I just want to thank all you great women out there who have been my friend, and been yourselves. I think you are all amazing, and I'm so grateful for your friendship. Here's hoping us all may have the courage to be ourselves and the companionship of other wonderful women.
Love you guys.. and a late Happy Mother's day to all the women in my world.. whether they are mother's now or not. Women are the mother's of the world.. and they are all needed, at whatever stage of life they are in.
ok, now I'm going to stop typing and go to bed. Goodnight Fair Maidens and Crazy Vixens. You all rock.
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
Saturday, March 27, 2010
Babymoon
Man, I'm a blog slacker lately. Oh well.. I'm sure you guys are just sitting there anxiously awaiting my posts.. lol.
So a couple weeks ago we went on a Babymoon! A lot of people seemed unaware of this wonderful term, so in case you are one of them a babymoon is sort of like a honeymoon, but you take it before the baby comes. We just did a weekend get away to fabulous downtown Salt Lake City. :) Way better than sitting in the car or a plane to go anywhere, because my main goal here was to sleep in and order room service, which could be done quite well in SLC.
My wonderful cousin Janell kept Ainsley for the weekend, so it was just the two of us. Ains was so excited to have slumber parties with Sadie and Addi. She just ran off as soon as we got to their house and didn't even say goodbye. Lil stinker.
We stayed at the Hotel Monaco. It was very nice and fancy. Our room was on the 12th floor and we had great views. We had gotten some kind of 'romance package' that came with the most fabulous room! Besides the king size bed and jacuzzi tub for two (the thing was like a swimming pool!) It also had this whole other room with couches and a dining table and another tv.. it was so cool we kept thinking we should invite people over to hang out.. but thought that might be a little weird "hey guys, come hang out in our hotel room.." yeah, it comes out a little weird.
By the time we got Ainsley dropped off and us checked in my lil prego body was just tired, so we ordered room service for dinner (why don't we always have that option??) and watched a movie in our room. Let me tell you, we are exciting people to be around, lol.
The next day we slept in, I woke up first and read a book for a while in one of the comfy couches in our little living room and awaited the arrival of breakfast to my door. (sighs fondly.. wishing juice, eggs and toast were walking their way up the stairs right now) When we felt like it we got up and went for a drive. We ended up in Babinski's, this shi-shi, fancy baby boutique. We walked around and looked at all the super cute stuff.. well, I looked, Tom mostly just made fun of all the prices. He also mocked the giant sock monkeys they had for sale and called my crafty sister Roxanne to try and talk her into making giant sock monkeys to sell for outrageous prices. We also wandered around some of the other shops nearby and enjoyed ourselves window shopping.
After that we drove to Costco because I was almost out of vitamins (I'm telling you, we are exciting people) however, all the walking around had taken the wind out of my sails and by the time we actually got to Costco I was ready for a nap. Tom, who had not wanted to go to Costco anyway, make the executive decision that I was too tired to walk through that huge store. So after driving all the way down there and finally finding a parking spot, we pulled out of it 2 minutes later and drove back to the hotel.
We then engaged in my current favorite activity... (get your mind out of the gutter people, we took a nap! lol) Yes, we crashed out on the nice king bed with the thick curtains drawn and were utterly lazy. It was beautiful. We woke up with just enough time to take trax from our hotel to the Gateway mall, grab a sandwich at the food court and chow it down before our appointment at the Day Spa. Man, I'd been looking forward to this. Tom got a 90 min massage while I got a 60 min massage and a 30 min facial. Yes, I am a pampered prego princess! :D
After pure bliss we decided to find something yummy for dinner. We were pretty close to the great japanese place we went to for my birthday, so we walked the 2 blocks to it... only to find it is now called the Copper Onion and is not a japanese place. Sad! We checked out the menu but weren't really excited about it, so we walked back the 2 blocks and decided to walk 2 more blocks in the other direction and go to the Market Street Grill, which Tom had always wanted to try. I was really craving sushi at this point but gave in with the promise of a nice brunch in the morning. :) So we had some tasty food and went back to the hotel for dessert. (Literally, we got cheesecake and chocolate cake from room service.. you dirty minded people).
The next morning we were up and at 'em just in time to make check out. We headed to the Little America for their huge breakfast buffet. I love breakfast food. I think it is my all-time favorite kind of food. Eggs Benedict is my particular weakness, but all the fresh fruit, french toast, waffles, biscuits and gravy and omelets were also appreciated. :) Thoroughly stuffed and waddling my prego butt out of there making comments about how I was skinny when I went in there to the people in line to get in, we made our way back to the car to go get our Ainsley and head back to regular life.
Our extra suite
Tom posing for me
So a couple weeks ago we went on a Babymoon! A lot of people seemed unaware of this wonderful term, so in case you are one of them a babymoon is sort of like a honeymoon, but you take it before the baby comes. We just did a weekend get away to fabulous downtown Salt Lake City. :) Way better than sitting in the car or a plane to go anywhere, because my main goal here was to sleep in and order room service, which could be done quite well in SLC.
My wonderful cousin Janell kept Ainsley for the weekend, so it was just the two of us. Ains was so excited to have slumber parties with Sadie and Addi. She just ran off as soon as we got to their house and didn't even say goodbye. Lil stinker.
We stayed at the Hotel Monaco. It was very nice and fancy. Our room was on the 12th floor and we had great views. We had gotten some kind of 'romance package' that came with the most fabulous room! Besides the king size bed and jacuzzi tub for two (the thing was like a swimming pool!) It also had this whole other room with couches and a dining table and another tv.. it was so cool we kept thinking we should invite people over to hang out.. but thought that might be a little weird "hey guys, come hang out in our hotel room.." yeah, it comes out a little weird.
By the time we got Ainsley dropped off and us checked in my lil prego body was just tired, so we ordered room service for dinner (why don't we always have that option??) and watched a movie in our room. Let me tell you, we are exciting people to be around, lol.
The next day we slept in, I woke up first and read a book for a while in one of the comfy couches in our little living room and awaited the arrival of breakfast to my door. (sighs fondly.. wishing juice, eggs and toast were walking their way up the stairs right now) When we felt like it we got up and went for a drive. We ended up in Babinski's, this shi-shi, fancy baby boutique. We walked around and looked at all the super cute stuff.. well, I looked, Tom mostly just made fun of all the prices. He also mocked the giant sock monkeys they had for sale and called my crafty sister Roxanne to try and talk her into making giant sock monkeys to sell for outrageous prices. We also wandered around some of the other shops nearby and enjoyed ourselves window shopping.
After that we drove to Costco because I was almost out of vitamins (I'm telling you, we are exciting people) however, all the walking around had taken the wind out of my sails and by the time we actually got to Costco I was ready for a nap. Tom, who had not wanted to go to Costco anyway, make the executive decision that I was too tired to walk through that huge store. So after driving all the way down there and finally finding a parking spot, we pulled out of it 2 minutes later and drove back to the hotel.
We then engaged in my current favorite activity... (get your mind out of the gutter people, we took a nap! lol) Yes, we crashed out on the nice king bed with the thick curtains drawn and were utterly lazy. It was beautiful. We woke up with just enough time to take trax from our hotel to the Gateway mall, grab a sandwich at the food court and chow it down before our appointment at the Day Spa. Man, I'd been looking forward to this. Tom got a 90 min massage while I got a 60 min massage and a 30 min facial. Yes, I am a pampered prego princess! :D
After pure bliss we decided to find something yummy for dinner. We were pretty close to the great japanese place we went to for my birthday, so we walked the 2 blocks to it... only to find it is now called the Copper Onion and is not a japanese place. Sad! We checked out the menu but weren't really excited about it, so we walked back the 2 blocks and decided to walk 2 more blocks in the other direction and go to the Market Street Grill, which Tom had always wanted to try. I was really craving sushi at this point but gave in with the promise of a nice brunch in the morning. :) So we had some tasty food and went back to the hotel for dessert. (Literally, we got cheesecake and chocolate cake from room service.. you dirty minded people).
The next morning we were up and at 'em just in time to make check out. We headed to the Little America for their huge breakfast buffet. I love breakfast food. I think it is my all-time favorite kind of food. Eggs Benedict is my particular weakness, but all the fresh fruit, french toast, waffles, biscuits and gravy and omelets were also appreciated. :) Thoroughly stuffed and waddling my prego butt out of there making comments about how I was skinny when I went in there to the people in line to get in, we made our way back to the car to go get our Ainsley and head back to regular life.
Hotel Monaco
Our extra suite
Tom posing for me
Monday, March 8, 2010
Sunday thoughts on a Monday afternoon
I have had so many thoughts of different post I want to type lately.. and by the lack of posts here you can see that the time and/or motivation did not appear to bring them to fruition.
So, I'm picking one for this free moment I've just found.. we'll see if I get to the other ones. :)
I think the last month or two has strengthened my testimony more than it has been since I can remember. The more I read about birth (yes, yes, I am still talking about this) the more amazed I am by the female body and any doubt in my mind that it was not designed by a supreme and amazing being that knew what He was doing has vanished. I can understand why we are considered his greatest creation. I won't go on about all the vast ways our bodies do what is needed if we just let them, and all the little things that work for the good of mothers and their babies. I don't want to focus on specific details that could offend or insult anyone.. or bring into discussion this amazing belief and faith that I have found, it's still so close to my heart. If anyone is curious I'd be happy to send them a passionate email. :) I just love the feeling that I am a divine creation who was given the abilities and tools I need to perform the greatest miracle, bring life into this world.
Though yes, I acknowledge that not every woman's body is perfect, not all of them work quite in the way it seems that they should. I know in the two years we tried for Ainsley I had many sad moments, seeing my body as a failure. And experiencing the loss of a pregnancy I had just proudly announced weeks before did not do much to inspire faith in this body of mine. But as I look back I see these as struggles I needed to go through, ending in blessings timed perfectly in His wisdom, not my timeline. I am trying my best to remember this and to give my will, hopes and worries up to the Lord. Even now as I navigate the joys, discomforts and anxiety that is pregnancy I am finding many times that I can shut out my fears with simple thoughts.
I don't know about other people.. but I mentally go off on sad, worried tangents.. such as "what if I am unpacking all these clothes and getting ready for a baby that never makes it here.. who will put these away, will someone come put them away before I get home from the hospital, sad and empty handed.. would I want to come home to no sign that she almost happened.. how would I handle that.. how would life go on.." when this starts to spiral out of control I give myself permission not to worry about it. I tell myself if this baby is supposed to be a part of our family she will make it here. If she isn't, than it wasn't meant to be.. and we'll figure that out. Maybe this wouldn't be comforting to others, but right now for me, it gives me the peace that I need.
I had a thought yesterday that meant a lot to me.. it was simple, and I'm not sure it's still verbatim.. but something along the lines of 'He is sending you girls because you will be good for them'.. I basically got this warm feeling that it wasn't just a toss of the dice whether we got a girl or a boy, 50/50 chance. She was picked to be in our family because He has faith in me to be a good mother to her, to teach her what she needs to know, to provide a warm and loving home where she can flourish. I hope that I can. It definitely makes me feel like I have a purpose and makes me want to try my hardest to live up to that belief in me.
I'm not always the most spiritual person, but I've really cherished these experiences and needed to put them down somewhere.. and that's why I made this blog, lol... so here they are. Thanks for listening.
So, I'm picking one for this free moment I've just found.. we'll see if I get to the other ones. :)
I think the last month or two has strengthened my testimony more than it has been since I can remember. The more I read about birth (yes, yes, I am still talking about this) the more amazed I am by the female body and any doubt in my mind that it was not designed by a supreme and amazing being that knew what He was doing has vanished. I can understand why we are considered his greatest creation. I won't go on about all the vast ways our bodies do what is needed if we just let them, and all the little things that work for the good of mothers and their babies. I don't want to focus on specific details that could offend or insult anyone.. or bring into discussion this amazing belief and faith that I have found, it's still so close to my heart. If anyone is curious I'd be happy to send them a passionate email. :) I just love the feeling that I am a divine creation who was given the abilities and tools I need to perform the greatest miracle, bring life into this world.
Though yes, I acknowledge that not every woman's body is perfect, not all of them work quite in the way it seems that they should. I know in the two years we tried for Ainsley I had many sad moments, seeing my body as a failure. And experiencing the loss of a pregnancy I had just proudly announced weeks before did not do much to inspire faith in this body of mine. But as I look back I see these as struggles I needed to go through, ending in blessings timed perfectly in His wisdom, not my timeline. I am trying my best to remember this and to give my will, hopes and worries up to the Lord. Even now as I navigate the joys, discomforts and anxiety that is pregnancy I am finding many times that I can shut out my fears with simple thoughts.
I don't know about other people.. but I mentally go off on sad, worried tangents.. such as "what if I am unpacking all these clothes and getting ready for a baby that never makes it here.. who will put these away, will someone come put them away before I get home from the hospital, sad and empty handed.. would I want to come home to no sign that she almost happened.. how would I handle that.. how would life go on.." when this starts to spiral out of control I give myself permission not to worry about it. I tell myself if this baby is supposed to be a part of our family she will make it here. If she isn't, than it wasn't meant to be.. and we'll figure that out. Maybe this wouldn't be comforting to others, but right now for me, it gives me the peace that I need.
I had a thought yesterday that meant a lot to me.. it was simple, and I'm not sure it's still verbatim.. but something along the lines of 'He is sending you girls because you will be good for them'.. I basically got this warm feeling that it wasn't just a toss of the dice whether we got a girl or a boy, 50/50 chance. She was picked to be in our family because He has faith in me to be a good mother to her, to teach her what she needs to know, to provide a warm and loving home where she can flourish. I hope that I can. It definitely makes me feel like I have a purpose and makes me want to try my hardest to live up to that belief in me.
I'm not always the most spiritual person, but I've really cherished these experiences and needed to put them down somewhere.. and that's why I made this blog, lol... so here they are. Thanks for listening.
Friday, February 19, 2010
Over-Prepared
Is there such a thing as too prepared? I've been spending my free moments reading countless birth stories, the latest birth related articles and discussing birth with other like-minded moms in online forums. I'm beginning to worry I'm going to go into birth overload with still about 100 days to go.. not good.
I also bought this cute cabinet for the babies room. I had seen it online and liked it, and thought it was a good price.. then while at Ikea getting Ainsley a new bed (to be featured on the fam blog.. as soon as I take a cute picture) I saw it in the 'as-is' section. It was only there because it had been a floor model, there was nothing wrong with it, and it was more than 25% cheaper.. so I had to snatch it up. I actually went back the next day cuz there was no way it was going to fit in our Tribecca with the bed we bought Ainsley.. plus Tom was with me, and I like to do my crazy purchases solo, lol. So I got someone who worked there to load it onto my cart, and then into my car. The fact that it's a floor model means I don't have to put it together by myself, which is awesome.. but it also means it barely fit, lol. In fact, it's still in our car. Tom's afraid it's too heavy for him.. so anyone who feels like coming over tomorrow Tom could use an extra set of hands. ;)
Anyway.. now that I have this cabinet.. I really want to start pulling out all the baby clothes I packed away and get them cleaned and folded and hung... but I keep reminding myself.. It's FEBRUARY.. I'm not due until mid-JUNE.. I really should pace myself here.. right?? I'm gonna run around and get all this stuff done and then just be sitting on my thumbs for the next couple of months?? Or maybe it would be good to get all this done.. before I'm walking around with a watermelon under my shirt instead of a cantaloupe. I guess I just don't want to get too far ahead of myself..
I'm not even really planning on setting up the nursery properly until after Miss Thang makes her appearance. I'm planning on moving Ainsley down to what is currently the guestroom and putting the baby in her room, and it seems a little silly to move her right away when I'm planning on keeping the baby in our room for at least the first four months.. maybe more. Plus.. I'm keeping the guest bed upstairs for when my awesome mom, and then equally awesome mother in law come stay with us for a week each after she's born to help out.. So it won't really be possible to completely set up a nursery.
I dunno, maybe it's nesting.. I can see the furniture and the clothes.. but is reading constantly about birth really nesting? I have the most overwhelming urge to know more, to read more.. it's becoming an obsession.. I can't stop. Maybe its mental nesting..
So, any opinions.. is getting the clothes ready 100 days before the baby's born a little bit ridiculous? Even just typing it, it sounds ridiculous. Who knows. The baby's kicking.. I think she's saying Hi to you all. :) Thanks for listening.. must go to bed now... after I read a little bit more.
I also bought this cute cabinet for the babies room. I had seen it online and liked it, and thought it was a good price.. then while at Ikea getting Ainsley a new bed (to be featured on the fam blog.. as soon as I take a cute picture) I saw it in the 'as-is' section. It was only there because it had been a floor model, there was nothing wrong with it, and it was more than 25% cheaper.. so I had to snatch it up. I actually went back the next day cuz there was no way it was going to fit in our Tribecca with the bed we bought Ainsley.. plus Tom was with me, and I like to do my crazy purchases solo, lol. So I got someone who worked there to load it onto my cart, and then into my car. The fact that it's a floor model means I don't have to put it together by myself, which is awesome.. but it also means it barely fit, lol. In fact, it's still in our car. Tom's afraid it's too heavy for him.. so anyone who feels like coming over tomorrow Tom could use an extra set of hands. ;)
Anyway.. now that I have this cabinet.. I really want to start pulling out all the baby clothes I packed away and get them cleaned and folded and hung... but I keep reminding myself.. It's FEBRUARY.. I'm not due until mid-JUNE.. I really should pace myself here.. right?? I'm gonna run around and get all this stuff done and then just be sitting on my thumbs for the next couple of months?? Or maybe it would be good to get all this done.. before I'm walking around with a watermelon under my shirt instead of a cantaloupe. I guess I just don't want to get too far ahead of myself..
I'm not even really planning on setting up the nursery properly until after Miss Thang makes her appearance. I'm planning on moving Ainsley down to what is currently the guestroom and putting the baby in her room, and it seems a little silly to move her right away when I'm planning on keeping the baby in our room for at least the first four months.. maybe more. Plus.. I'm keeping the guest bed upstairs for when my awesome mom, and then equally awesome mother in law come stay with us for a week each after she's born to help out.. So it won't really be possible to completely set up a nursery.
I dunno, maybe it's nesting.. I can see the furniture and the clothes.. but is reading constantly about birth really nesting? I have the most overwhelming urge to know more, to read more.. it's becoming an obsession.. I can't stop. Maybe its mental nesting..
So, any opinions.. is getting the clothes ready 100 days before the baby's born a little bit ridiculous? Even just typing it, it sounds ridiculous. Who knows. The baby's kicking.. I think she's saying Hi to you all. :) Thanks for listening.. must go to bed now... after I read a little bit more.
Monday, February 8, 2010
Birth Plans
I am not planning a natural birth because I like pain.. I'm actually a bit of a baby. I have a very low pain threshold. This post is not to influence or offend anyone.. but lately my world has been revolving around this subject.. so I just had to post it.
I'm retaking the birth class I took when I was pregnant with Ainsley. Partly because its been 3 years, and I forget stuff.. and party because I enjoyed it so much the first time through It's a bradley method class, but our teacher also incorporates other things she has learned and found beneficial over the years. I really love the class. It's 12 weeks long, one night a week. This may seem excessive to some, but its so great. One night a week we get to slow down life and focus on this big thing that's about to change our lives forever. I think it really helped Tom to feel more a part of whats going on and to have a better appreciation of what I'm going through.
What do you do for 12 weeks you ask? Well, we learn about how the body works and changes during pregnancy and about nutrition and exercises that work muscles that help to carry the baby and with the delivery. We learn about nursing. We learn about different pressure points that your partner can use to relieve some of the aches and pains throughout pregnancy and during delivery. Different positions that you can try to be more comfortable while pregnant as well as different ways you can try during labor to help work the baby out. We also learn about all the options you have during labor.. what things are your choice, and what things are more just there because of tradition and to make the process easier for the doctor, that you have the right to say no to if you want.
I want to reiterate that I am not anti-medicine, anti-doctor.. I'm not even anti-epidural, I believe that there can come a point where a woman's body has tried and worked until it needs a rest.. and that is a humane and sympathetic use of the epidural.
I'm so grateful that we have these miracles when they are needed. I have a good friend whose body just never goes into labor. She was about 2 weeks late with her first child when her water broke and 20 hours later.. she still never went into labor. She's somebody who would've died in the old west with nothing to be done about it. I'm SO grateful we have the technology to save my dear friend and her adorable little boy.
It just seems that a lot of these advances are used now without real need, and especially without informing people of the possible side effects and risk.. and what possible benefits they could be forgoing.
I just tried to type a list of the things I've learned in class... but I'm so afraid someone will take something that I'm saying the wrong way and become defensive... that I'm having the hardest time writing it. To me its all amazing info that should be out there.. but birth is such a touchy subject.. so I went online and found a nice little list detailing pretty much everything I wanted to say in less emotional and more precise ways.
So ladies.. next time you ask me 'why would you feel pain if you don't have to...' this is my answer
The Benefits of Natural Birth
1. Mothers who labor naturally can move freely, go to the bathroom, walk and change positions throughout labor. According to the Cochrane Review, recent studies have shown that getting medication makes changing positions even after birth more difficult.
2. Since you can feel your body's reflexes in natural childbirth, mothers can push better and generally faster. In fact studies show that getting an epidural prolongs your pushing time.
3. The pain during labor serves a purpose by guiding the mother to seek certain positions. For example, if her back hurts, she will naturally seek positions off her back which can help to turn her baby. Having back pain is one sign that the baby might be posterior and needs to rotate.
4. Mothers often describe that their recovery after a natural childbirth was faster and easier since they could get right up and walk and shower. Usually they eat right away and their appetite is normal.
5. Endorphins secreted during a natural childbirth have been found in the placenta and umbilical cord. This may serve a purpose to help the baby adjust to life outside as well as make the journey more comfortable for baby.
6. Research has shown that in mothers who have natural childbirth, babies are more alert and show more interest in pre-breastfeeding behaviours such as sucking and massaging the mother's breasts, as well as the actual length of time they spend nursing within the first 90 minutes.
There are plenty of other things I could go off about.. but I am too emotional about this and to prevent offending anyone I'll end there. Tho anyone who reads this birth and has other things to add to the list of benefits of a natural birth.. please do. :)
Thanks for listening.. I will strive to not gush overmuch on this subject in the future.. but until June, it will be on my mind a lot. So we'll see, lol. And if anyone wants anymore info or has anymore questions.. I'd love to be of help :)
I'm retaking the birth class I took when I was pregnant with Ainsley. Partly because its been 3 years, and I forget stuff.. and party because I enjoyed it so much the first time through It's a bradley method class, but our teacher also incorporates other things she has learned and found beneficial over the years. I really love the class. It's 12 weeks long, one night a week. This may seem excessive to some, but its so great. One night a week we get to slow down life and focus on this big thing that's about to change our lives forever. I think it really helped Tom to feel more a part of whats going on and to have a better appreciation of what I'm going through.
What do you do for 12 weeks you ask? Well, we learn about how the body works and changes during pregnancy and about nutrition and exercises that work muscles that help to carry the baby and with the delivery. We learn about nursing. We learn about different pressure points that your partner can use to relieve some of the aches and pains throughout pregnancy and during delivery. Different positions that you can try to be more comfortable while pregnant as well as different ways you can try during labor to help work the baby out. We also learn about all the options you have during labor.. what things are your choice, and what things are more just there because of tradition and to make the process easier for the doctor, that you have the right to say no to if you want.
I want to reiterate that I am not anti-medicine, anti-doctor.. I'm not even anti-epidural, I believe that there can come a point where a woman's body has tried and worked until it needs a rest.. and that is a humane and sympathetic use of the epidural.
I'm so grateful that we have these miracles when they are needed. I have a good friend whose body just never goes into labor. She was about 2 weeks late with her first child when her water broke and 20 hours later.. she still never went into labor. She's somebody who would've died in the old west with nothing to be done about it. I'm SO grateful we have the technology to save my dear friend and her adorable little boy.
It just seems that a lot of these advances are used now without real need, and especially without informing people of the possible side effects and risk.. and what possible benefits they could be forgoing.
I just tried to type a list of the things I've learned in class... but I'm so afraid someone will take something that I'm saying the wrong way and become defensive... that I'm having the hardest time writing it. To me its all amazing info that should be out there.. but birth is such a touchy subject.. so I went online and found a nice little list detailing pretty much everything I wanted to say in less emotional and more precise ways.
So ladies.. next time you ask me 'why would you feel pain if you don't have to...' this is my answer
The Benefits of Natural Birth
1. Mothers who labor naturally can move freely, go to the bathroom, walk and change positions throughout labor. According to the Cochrane Review, recent studies have shown that getting medication makes changing positions even after birth more difficult.
2. Since you can feel your body's reflexes in natural childbirth, mothers can push better and generally faster. In fact studies show that getting an epidural prolongs your pushing time.
3. The pain during labor serves a purpose by guiding the mother to seek certain positions. For example, if her back hurts, she will naturally seek positions off her back which can help to turn her baby. Having back pain is one sign that the baby might be posterior and needs to rotate.
4. Mothers often describe that their recovery after a natural childbirth was faster and easier since they could get right up and walk and shower. Usually they eat right away and their appetite is normal.
5. Endorphins secreted during a natural childbirth have been found in the placenta and umbilical cord. This may serve a purpose to help the baby adjust to life outside as well as make the journey more comfortable for baby.
6. Research has shown that in mothers who have natural childbirth, babies are more alert and show more interest in pre-breastfeeding behaviours such as sucking and massaging the mother's breasts, as well as the actual length of time they spend nursing within the first 90 minutes.
There are plenty of other things I could go off about.. but I am too emotional about this and to prevent offending anyone I'll end there. Tho anyone who reads this birth and has other things to add to the list of benefits of a natural birth.. please do. :)
Thanks for listening.. I will strive to not gush overmuch on this subject in the future.. but until June, it will be on my mind a lot. So we'll see, lol. And if anyone wants anymore info or has anymore questions.. I'd love to be of help :)
Monday, February 1, 2010
the wee small hours of the morning
it's 12:30am.. everyone in the house is asleep except for me. I just finished an older movie called '84 Charing Cross Road' about somewhat of a love affair developed through letters that never came to much of anything besides a grand friendship. It's put me in something of a melancholy mood.
At times like these I can't help but think of a song from the 'sleepless in seattle' soundtrack
"when the sun is high in the afternoon sky you can always find something to do
but from dusk til dawn as the clock ticks on.. something happens to you
in the wee small hours of the morning, when the whole wide world is fast asleep
i lie awake and think about the void and never ever think of counting sheep"
I don't know what it is about being the last one awake. The world becomes a secret place known only to me, where I observe without being observed and my mind goes off on paths of its own design.
I also watched the 2nd episode of the new miniseries pbs is doing of Emma earlier (which is when Tom fell asleep, lol.. tho he usually appreciates the witty repartee of that era). It left me wanting more, especially as there is another episode yet to be aired so it ended it at quite an intriguing place. There wasn't much on tv that would satisfy, so I turned to Netflix instant offerings. The only thing really like it I came across was 'Persuasion' which I had just watched a few days ago, and so I went searching for something new, and found '84 Charing Cross Road'. I'm on a mission to watch all great old movies possible and am glad I took the time to watch this one. It's based on a true story that became a novel, so I may have to pick that up as well. The correspondence was between a woman in NYC and a gentleman in London. The woman always wanted to go to London and said once that she watched old English movies just to see the streets. I know how she felt.
I was lucky enough to have made it there once, however I fear the week I spent in London only added to my desire to be there again. Tom and I sometimes day dream about spending a year there. Just finding some job, renting out the house and going. I am fortunate that my husband shares my love of London. Growing up in Sunny Las Vegas has made him yearn for the foggy street of London, and I adore that about him. Maybe someday we'll do it. I keep thinking that if we're going to make it happen, we should just make it happen.. but it seems as though life always has different plans for us. Something's always happening, and moving to London for a year seems a bit silly in the face of everything else. However, we continue to dream, and what is life without dreams.
Well, I'm not sure who coherent this post will be.. but it's been cathartic to purge myself of my wee hours wonderings and maybe now I'll be able to sleep.
Here's a snapshot of Tom and I over in Jolly ol' england to cap it off. Cheers.
At times like these I can't help but think of a song from the 'sleepless in seattle' soundtrack
"when the sun is high in the afternoon sky you can always find something to do
but from dusk til dawn as the clock ticks on.. something happens to you
in the wee small hours of the morning, when the whole wide world is fast asleep
i lie awake and think about the void and never ever think of counting sheep"
I don't know what it is about being the last one awake. The world becomes a secret place known only to me, where I observe without being observed and my mind goes off on paths of its own design.
I also watched the 2nd episode of the new miniseries pbs is doing of Emma earlier (which is when Tom fell asleep, lol.. tho he usually appreciates the witty repartee of that era). It left me wanting more, especially as there is another episode yet to be aired so it ended it at quite an intriguing place. There wasn't much on tv that would satisfy, so I turned to Netflix instant offerings. The only thing really like it I came across was 'Persuasion' which I had just watched a few days ago, and so I went searching for something new, and found '84 Charing Cross Road'. I'm on a mission to watch all great old movies possible and am glad I took the time to watch this one. It's based on a true story that became a novel, so I may have to pick that up as well. The correspondence was between a woman in NYC and a gentleman in London. The woman always wanted to go to London and said once that she watched old English movies just to see the streets. I know how she felt.
I was lucky enough to have made it there once, however I fear the week I spent in London only added to my desire to be there again. Tom and I sometimes day dream about spending a year there. Just finding some job, renting out the house and going. I am fortunate that my husband shares my love of London. Growing up in Sunny Las Vegas has made him yearn for the foggy street of London, and I adore that about him. Maybe someday we'll do it. I keep thinking that if we're going to make it happen, we should just make it happen.. but it seems as though life always has different plans for us. Something's always happening, and moving to London for a year seems a bit silly in the face of everything else. However, we continue to dream, and what is life without dreams.
Well, I'm not sure who coherent this post will be.. but it's been cathartic to purge myself of my wee hours wonderings and maybe now I'll be able to sleep.
Here's a snapshot of Tom and I over in Jolly ol' england to cap it off. Cheers.
Monday, January 25, 2010
Whine and Cheese
it's been a while.. although I'm not sure how many of you out there are still reading I apologize to those who have. It's been a busy, strange bit of time. And I think perhaps part of the reason for my delay in chronicling my thoughts has been out of a desire not to post another depressing mood piece.. I feel as though I only use this forum to whine, which will never do. (Also, I just watched two Jane Austen movies.. and I feel this may be influencing my writing style somewhat today, pray forgive me, but this is how I feel like expressing myself).
For weeks I've been tempted to write about how I feel disconnected from this pregnancy.. it's so weird, and not something you can readily discuss in polite society.. and yet I do. I feel partly in denial that this event is really taking place. After mulling over it in my mind for some time, I've come to the conclusion that at least part of it is a self-preserving act on behalf of my sub-conscious. Pregnancy is so full of anxiety, there is so much that can go wrong in 40 weeks. Sadness befalls so many, and sometime quite abruptly, with little warning. I was a complete wreck with worry while pregnant with Ainsley and I can't quite handle that right now. I think part of my brain has decided that this is the smarter course. I have one beautiful amazing daughter who I already worry about constantly.. if this one actually makes an appearance, well then, how great will be our joy. However, should tragedy strike.. perhaps I will be more prepared. You may find this to be a morose and bizarre way to view this miracle I am apart of, and I did not intend to take this point of view and yet I find it thrust upon me. So I will make the best of it, I will make preparations and have hopes, in my own in-denial kind of way. :)
Well... you see now why I have delayed in putting my thoughts on paper.. I hope they aren't too shocking. I'm hoping to blame the additional hormones coursing through my body at present for a major portion of my funk. I am having the hardest time feeling pretty. I feel old, and worn and currently getting larger in strange places. I just got a fun new hair color, but can't bring myself to take a picture of it because of my face. Maybe I'll get Tom to take a picture of me from behind. lol.
To end on a more positive note.. today I'm at 20 weeks, the halfway mark. So I have made it thus far. I will strive to have a positive attitude this week. I have good things coming this week. My birth class tonight, a fun playdate w friend the next, a baby shower for my dear friend on Thursday and then a trip to the cabin for the weekend. Could turn out to be a marvelous week. I wish you all a marvelous week.. and the chance to watch two Jane Austen movies in a row... should you wish it. :)
For weeks I've been tempted to write about how I feel disconnected from this pregnancy.. it's so weird, and not something you can readily discuss in polite society.. and yet I do. I feel partly in denial that this event is really taking place. After mulling over it in my mind for some time, I've come to the conclusion that at least part of it is a self-preserving act on behalf of my sub-conscious. Pregnancy is so full of anxiety, there is so much that can go wrong in 40 weeks. Sadness befalls so many, and sometime quite abruptly, with little warning. I was a complete wreck with worry while pregnant with Ainsley and I can't quite handle that right now. I think part of my brain has decided that this is the smarter course. I have one beautiful amazing daughter who I already worry about constantly.. if this one actually makes an appearance, well then, how great will be our joy. However, should tragedy strike.. perhaps I will be more prepared. You may find this to be a morose and bizarre way to view this miracle I am apart of, and I did not intend to take this point of view and yet I find it thrust upon me. So I will make the best of it, I will make preparations and have hopes, in my own in-denial kind of way. :)
Well... you see now why I have delayed in putting my thoughts on paper.. I hope they aren't too shocking. I'm hoping to blame the additional hormones coursing through my body at present for a major portion of my funk. I am having the hardest time feeling pretty. I feel old, and worn and currently getting larger in strange places. I just got a fun new hair color, but can't bring myself to take a picture of it because of my face. Maybe I'll get Tom to take a picture of me from behind. lol.
To end on a more positive note.. today I'm at 20 weeks, the halfway mark. So I have made it thus far. I will strive to have a positive attitude this week. I have good things coming this week. My birth class tonight, a fun playdate w friend the next, a baby shower for my dear friend on Thursday and then a trip to the cabin for the weekend. Could turn out to be a marvelous week. I wish you all a marvelous week.. and the chance to watch two Jane Austen movies in a row... should you wish it. :)
Friday, January 1, 2010
New Years Flash Back..
Happy New Year Peeps!
Man its been a while since I blogged. Almost a whole month. The holidays are crazy.. but we all know that. Anyway.. As I was thinking about the New Year this morning I was thinking back to the killer New Years Eve party my friend Jessica and I threw back when I was still living in Texas. I think it was probably one of the most fun New Years ever. Nowadays new years is mostly just eating junk food and watching a movie until 12, kiss and then bed, lol. Man, I feel old, lol. Anyway, I don't count the new year as one of the more exciting holidays anymore. But that year was great.. and so I went to find the couple pics I've scanned in from that pics I saw that it was New Years Eve 1999.. which means it was 10 years ago last night. 10 years! That's so crazy to me. It was a lifetime ago..
How different the world seems to me now than it did then, how much I learned, how much has happened.. So I thought I'd recap the last 10 years.. if only so I dont forget it all 10 years from now, lol.
ok, since New Years Eve 1999...
May 2000 my boyfriend finally got it together and left on his mission (he was 23, wasn't sure it would happen) I thought I'd never survive.
Having nothing left really keeping me in Texas, and a cousin who recommended USU, in Aug 2000 I packed up and drove the 940 miles (14 1/2 hrs) to Logan Utah and started a new life in a town where I knew absolutely no one.
Found a job and an apartment. Ended up with a group of girls who made everyday fun, were always there for me and changed my life. They helped me accept who I am, and teach me who I could be. Everyone needs a group like that.
The next 2-3 years I finished up my classes in psychology and loved them. Felt like I found my calling. I also had to find a new apartment due to lack of money and my girls all getting married or moving on. Stumbled into my 2nd lucky roommate chance. In Caroline I found a kindred spirit I believe I'll never lose. May 2002 missionary came home.. did not work out.. Started to re-evaluate life.. Caroline and I both made it through the rest of school together, through finals and heartaches and life changing decisions and nights of laughter and mornings of commiseration. She decided to serve a mission and I made the decision to walk away from a wonderful boy, a friend who loved me.. to marry a friend that I loved. Amazingly hard decision.. but right.
Tom and I had been friends since we met before he left for his mission in 1997 and as the years passed and I dated others it become more and more obvious that we were supposed to be together. I graduated in May of 2003 and we were married in August 2003. We bought a house in November.. felt so grown up and old. The next spring we went on the trip of a lifetime and saw London and Paris and I couldn't stop mentally berating myself for not throwing caution to the wind and going on a semester abroad to London the year my friend Anna went. An entire semester in London.. sigh.. it still makes me wistful thinking about it. Lets call that one of my biggest regret for the last 10 years.
Well for the next 3 years i mostly worked and lived life.. took some trips to cali and texas and seattle... nothing super crazy happened..
tried to get pregnant.. and tried and tried... and then october 06 I finally found out I was. :) June 07 she showed up and changed life forever.. August 07 my mil took all the sisters/sil's to NYC.. almost didn't go.. so hard to leave my lil girl for the weekend.. but did it.. awesome experience, glad I went.. had wanted to go to NY since I was in High School and had decided I wanted to be on Broadway when I grew up, lol..
June 08 we made our first move as a family when we bought a new house. Love the new neighborhood and house, but it was strangely sad to leave behind the house Ainsley was born in. Sept 08 made it back to NYC, this time with Tom and all the other married Christensen's. Spring 09 we went to hawaii!
Our first big vacation just the two of us.. we almost took Ains with us, and we missed her like crazy.. but it was fun to have some time just the two of us. And this fall/winter.. took Ains to disneyland for the first time and found out baby #2 is coming to change out life again..
wow.. after all that I feel like I've had quite a full 10 years.. I may be older.. fatter.. but at least I'm wiser.. lol.. and happier, more fulfilled.. I love my life. Along the way a lot could've happened differently, so grateful for what I have, and am looking forward to another great year.. who knows what it holds in store.
Man its been a while since I blogged. Almost a whole month. The holidays are crazy.. but we all know that. Anyway.. As I was thinking about the New Year this morning I was thinking back to the killer New Years Eve party my friend Jessica and I threw back when I was still living in Texas. I think it was probably one of the most fun New Years ever. Nowadays new years is mostly just eating junk food and watching a movie until 12, kiss and then bed, lol. Man, I feel old, lol. Anyway, I don't count the new year as one of the more exciting holidays anymore. But that year was great.. and so I went to find the couple pics I've scanned in from that pics I saw that it was New Years Eve 1999.. which means it was 10 years ago last night. 10 years! That's so crazy to me. It was a lifetime ago..
(me and my 3 besties in 1999, Anna and Emily
home from College and Jeska my roomie)
How different the world seems to me now than it did then, how much I learned, how much has happened.. So I thought I'd recap the last 10 years.. if only so I dont forget it all 10 years from now, lol.
ok, since New Years Eve 1999...
May 2000 my boyfriend finally got it together and left on his mission (he was 23, wasn't sure it would happen) I thought I'd never survive.
Having nothing left really keeping me in Texas, and a cousin who recommended USU, in Aug 2000 I packed up and drove the 940 miles (14 1/2 hrs) to Logan Utah and started a new life in a town where I knew absolutely no one.
Found a job and an apartment. Ended up with a group of girls who made everyday fun, were always there for me and changed my life. They helped me accept who I am, and teach me who I could be. Everyone needs a group like that.
The next 2-3 years I finished up my classes in psychology and loved them. Felt like I found my calling. I also had to find a new apartment due to lack of money and my girls all getting married or moving on. Stumbled into my 2nd lucky roommate chance. In Caroline I found a kindred spirit I believe I'll never lose. May 2002 missionary came home.. did not work out.. Started to re-evaluate life.. Caroline and I both made it through the rest of school together, through finals and heartaches and life changing decisions and nights of laughter and mornings of commiseration. She decided to serve a mission and I made the decision to walk away from a wonderful boy, a friend who loved me.. to marry a friend that I loved. Amazingly hard decision.. but right.
Tom and I had been friends since we met before he left for his mission in 1997 and as the years passed and I dated others it become more and more obvious that we were supposed to be together. I graduated in May of 2003 and we were married in August 2003. We bought a house in November.. felt so grown up and old. The next spring we went on the trip of a lifetime and saw London and Paris and I couldn't stop mentally berating myself for not throwing caution to the wind and going on a semester abroad to London the year my friend Anna went. An entire semester in London.. sigh.. it still makes me wistful thinking about it. Lets call that one of my biggest regret for the last 10 years.
Well for the next 3 years i mostly worked and lived life.. took some trips to cali and texas and seattle... nothing super crazy happened..
tried to get pregnant.. and tried and tried... and then october 06 I finally found out I was. :) June 07 she showed up and changed life forever.. August 07 my mil took all the sisters/sil's to NYC.. almost didn't go.. so hard to leave my lil girl for the weekend.. but did it.. awesome experience, glad I went.. had wanted to go to NY since I was in High School and had decided I wanted to be on Broadway when I grew up, lol..
June 08 we made our first move as a family when we bought a new house. Love the new neighborhood and house, but it was strangely sad to leave behind the house Ainsley was born in. Sept 08 made it back to NYC, this time with Tom and all the other married Christensen's. Spring 09 we went to hawaii!
Our first big vacation just the two of us.. we almost took Ains with us, and we missed her like crazy.. but it was fun to have some time just the two of us. And this fall/winter.. took Ains to disneyland for the first time and found out baby #2 is coming to change out life again..wow.. after all that I feel like I've had quite a full 10 years.. I may be older.. fatter.. but at least I'm wiser.. lol.. and happier, more fulfilled.. I love my life. Along the way a lot could've happened differently, so grateful for what I have, and am looking forward to another great year.. who knows what it holds in store.
HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!
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